


With his ghost-white makeup, his alien eyes encircled by strange purple lines, and his tufts of orange hair - all atop a body clothed in the finest shabbiness - he's like a sentient version of the "Kids can craft, too!" aisle at a Hobby Lobby that's decided to destroy its creators. Related Why is there another Alice movie? Would you believe money is involved? But where Sparrow (or even The Lone Ranger's much-derided Tonto) is the real deal, a character grounded in something deeper than the surface-level whimsy, the Hatter is all frippery. Johnny Depp's Mad Hatter is the nadir of his post–Jack Sparrow approach to character - a funny voice, a series of flourish-y gestures, and a collection of costume pieces. 1) Would you risk all of space and time to save one of Johnny Depp's more irritating characters? Save the life of my Mad Hatter. So here are five things I wondered to myself during Alice Through the Looking Glass. At least it has a somewhat coherent plot, even if it seems blithely unaware of the fact that its protagonist very nearly destroys an entire universe just for fun.Īnd as my mind wandered while I watched, I kept coming back to questions that sort of had bearing on the movie and sort of didn't.

(Its predecessor, 2010's Alice in Wonderland, made a boatload of money, which is why this film exists.) And the sad thing is that for as bad as Looking Glass is, it's probably better than the original film.

So it goes with Looking Glass, one of the more unnecessary sequels in an age of unnecessary sequels. That's how desperately I wanted out of Wonderland. My brain, so exhausted and assaulted by everything happening onscreen, threw up a surrender flag, crawled into a bunker, and started amusing itself by trying to run calculations on how far a clock's hour hand travels over certain periods of time.
